This photo is like the gift that keeps on giving. First, I was simply going to ask, what the hell is going on in this picture? Why is Mischa Barton is surrounded by shirtless camera hogs and a tuxedo-clad lech who appears to be miming some sort of shudder-inducing foreplay?
Well, the photo caption told me she was on an Italian TV show called "Chiambreth Night," so off to YouTube I strolled. And boy was I glad to have made the journey -- because what lay in wait was something akin to "America's Funniest Home Videos" combined with "Saturday Night Live," public access programming and a VH1 "Where Are They Now" special.
The Italian chatfest appears to be the inspiration for "SNL's" Vinny Vedecci Show since the celebs in both cases are separated from the host by a massive language barrier. Luckily in Mischa's case, an earpiece translates -- but I'm getting ahead of myself.
Once the host announces who the guest is, a clip from "The O.C" (or in his words, "Ho C") is shown, which just so happens to be the pilot episode. Naturally, this makes me think the Fox series has only just made its way to Italy. Spoiler alert: "Ho C" goes downhill real fast!
After the clip, a Run DMC-lookin mo fo -- who functions as "Chiambreth's" Paul Shaffer -- supplies a rap as Mischa walks in. The first line of said song, "love and sex, Jamaica, no problem." No problem indeed!
The camera then cuts to twin brothers dancing in matching red sweaters, four women shakin' it in gold lame catsuits and a man dressed as an unstylish businesslady before the rapper proclaims that Mischa Barton is "sexier than Lady Diana Spencer."
To steal a line from Ryan, what the nuts?!?!?!