- Last Updated: 12:33 AM, May 7, 2012
- Posted: 7:15 PM, May 5, 2012
How can I tell the guy I’m dating that I have zero interest in ever attending one of his rec team’s baseball games?
Oh, come on! You have to go at least once. Look, I know the idea of watching grown men sweat and compete at a non-professional level seems gross and a tad, well, boring, but if you’re really into him, then it shouldn’t matter. Don’t you want to be involved in your guy’s life? The fact that he even wants you to come is promising! Your presence must mean a lot to him. He probably wants to show off his skills — and his hot girlfriend!
There are ways to make it fun. First, invite a girlfriend and pack a canteen filled with alcoholic beverages. These games are usually outside, and on a nice spring night, after work, sitting on the bleachers with a boozy beverage with your pals could be fun!
I’d also turn his game into an erotic “scoring” situation for the two of you. For example, set goals. If he scores in the first inning, (it’s innings in baseball, right?) then tell him you’ll go to “first” with him in a location of his choice. If he scores during the second inning, let him get to second base in, say, the back of a cab. Just use your imagination. And don’t be afraid to make him be the giver. You’ll be his cheerleader, if he lights up the scoreboard, baby!
I’m Catholic, and my girlfriend is Jewish. We’re both practicing, and yet we’ve found a way to make it work. Our parents, however, are not so accepting. How can we smooth over the situation?
First, I commend you both for doing what makes you happy. So many people just aren’t strong enough to “fight the power,” so I think it’s great that you’ve managed to stand up for yourselves.
If you haven’t already, I’d use that as your first point of discussion: This is what makes you happy. At the end of the day, that’s what any parent should want for their child. (I know it’s not that simple, so bear with me.)
After you’ve stated that, calmly placate them by admitting that you understand their concerns and values, and are fully aware of the challenges you face. However, once again, they’re YOUR challenges.
Sometimes older people are really stubborn and can’t see beyond their beliefs and what they know. What they will see, however, is you pulling away. And I bet you that losing their son or daughter may not be worth the fight. It’s up to you to convince them that being present in your life — and experiencing all the different happy occasions on the horizon (marriage, grandchildren, etc.) — is what’s most important; not religion.
This will take time, especially if they’re devout and practicing. So stand your ground, but be understanding and patient.
But please, remain hopeful and don’t sacrifice your own happiness for approval from your parents. At the end of the day, it’s your life.