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‘Shore’ losers reach Brooklyn

  • Last Updated: 3:59 AM, February 23, 2012
  • Posted: 12:40 AM, February 23, 2012
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Just when you thought it was safe to return to the beach, it’s time to put on your skintight jeans and gel your hair into submission.

The foul-mouthed, drunken bimbos, buffoons and gangsta wannabes who embarrassed New Jersey and disgraced America, while turning every Italian outside of Milan into foul-mouthed nymphomaniacs, are back in action.

This time, the stage isn’t the Jersey Shore. It’s New York. Brooklyn, to be exact — an ethnically diverse and increasingly prosperous borough where, in 2012, one can easily find a college-educated human who is not a priest. Gang warfare and fresh mozzarella have grown as rare as loud Sunday-night dinners with the grandparents.

Paul Martinka

But don’t tell that to the producers of “Brooklyn 11223” — a reality show set to stink up our shores next month on the Oxygen network. With its caricatures of slutty “guidos” totally lacking in manners and sexual restraint, who bear the absence of a vocabulary beyond “fuhgeddaboudit!” the show cements the basest bigotry. For Italians today may represent the last group that TV producers are permitted to malign. It’s also fun and profitable.

The show is modeled on the John Travolta movie “Saturday Night Fever” — which came out 35 years ago. It was revealed in the 1990s that the film’s dumb, sexed-up characters, introduced in a groundbreaking article in New York magazine, were totally fabricated by the author, Brit Nik Cohn.

So now we’ve got a reality show based on one of history’s greatest journalistic frauds.

The show centers around skanky gals Joey Lynn Tekulve (left in photo), 24, and Christie Maria Livoti (right), 23. (Note the vowels.) Though they’re adults, the ladies live to harbor a beef that goes back years, when Joey is believed to have seduced Christie’s boyfriend.

“If somebody does wrong to one of us, it’s like doing it to all of us,” Christie says, Mafia-style, in what may be New York’s last remaining Brooklyn accent. Doesn’t anyone have a job around here? Well, one girl is a bartender.

“Brooklyn 11223” purports that Bay Ridge (which lies in another ZIP code) is a small hamlet divided into rival girl gangs, torn by betrayal, skimpy clothes and lack of familiarity with feminism. As a nod to real reality, a token character is a Muslim-American who hides her libertine lifestyle from her family.

“Here we go again!” moaned Andre DiMino, national president of the Jersey-based Italian-American One Voice Coalition. While he thinks “The Godfather” is a great work of fiction, DiMino says viewers believe what they see on reality TV.

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