By LUKAS I. ALPERT, Wire Services
June 6, 2008
Texas justice doesn't mess around.
A Brownsville justice of the peace ordered a man to paddle his teenage stepdaughter with a plank of wood, threatening to convict her of truancy if he did not.
The family was appalled and has sued, saying "that an individual striking an animal with [the paddle] might reasonably be reported for cruelty to an animal."
Why would anyone want to buy these now?
Utah police arrested a woman who stole two 14-karat gold bracelets from a pawnshop by swallowing them. The bracelets, worth $2,000, were recovered. Police won't say how, but, well, you know.
The bracelets are back on display at the shop in Salt Lake City.
Of course, that makes perfect sense.
A 61-year-old Barberton, Ohio, woman was arrested for pointing a rifle out her car window at students waiting for a bus, explaining, "They're going to kill me, so I might as well kill them."
Police said Sheila Kinsey did not seem aware of the seriousness of her actions.
Talk about comfortably numb.
A German man who passed out on the railroad tracks was so drunk, he didn't even wake up when a train rolled over him.
Franz Zimmerman, who was fives over the DWI blood-alcohol limit, was unhurt.
"I have no idea how he could sleep through the noise of the wheels screeching," the train driver said.
Surely, their mates will appreciate it.
Scientists say they have come up with a vaccine that will cut down on the amount of methane released when a cow or sheep farts.
Animal farts account for 25 percent of the methane produced in England, and 90 percent in lamb-laden New Zealand.
